Flowers are not just for Valentine's Day
Okay, So you have an idea of what may be causing your insecure girlfriend or partner, if not check out my page on understanding where insecurities stem from – Insecure Girfriend or Partner
What can you do about it?
The cause of insecurities also holds the key as to how to deal with them:
Relationship Security
Security within a relationship is one of the key qualities a women is looking for when choosing a life partner. This is not a big wallet or multiple degrees, it is about being able to provide them a loving and caring environment where they feel comfortable and secure. They want to be able to come home from work and be able to spend time with someone that cares and respects them for who they are. Believing that their male partner is returning home or welcoming them home and is also keen to see them and wanting to spend time with them.
Open up Communication with your Insecure Girlfriend or Partner with 1000 Questions for Couples
Work Place
The work environment is one place we have little control over with our partners or girlfriends, unless you work with them. The key thing that you need to remember is that you cannot fix their work place problems, so do not provide them with solutions. Remember you are only hearing one side of the story. If you really want to help, listen to them and ask them how they feel about the situation, if you have a similar situation or experience then say how you dealt with it and what you learnt from the way you done it. Don’t Don’t Don’t try and solve their problem, just let them vent it and let them know you paying attention to what they are saying and that you care about how they feel.
On the other side you may have an insecure partner or girlfriend that believes you are spending far too much time in the office or on business trips. They may start to feel you are having an affair. These are dangerous waters and very difficult to move out of. If you can both organise it, have lunch together regularly, even if it is at the office or the local park. You could even ask her to bring your lunch to work for you. In effect you want her to feel that your work mates know who she is and introduce her to some of them, even the other women. Just try and involve her in some way with your work and work trips. Take her on one of your work trips if possible and extend it to a weekend away together.
Self Esteem
If is difficult to manage one’s own self esteem without having to pay particular attention to someone else’s. This said, you can follow a simple technique to avoid being the continuous cause of insecurities. Always be honest with your comments. At times this may work against you and you may regret some comments, but over time she will come to respect your honesty and if you maintain this honesty, she will start to feel secure with you. She will feel that you like her for who she is not who she can be or the false images portrayed in common media.
Negative Body Language
Body language can just be unfair for men, as our body’s may respond before we are able to verbalise how we feel or the way we truly feel. Many men freeze up when put on the spot with a question or comment from an insecure girlfriend or partner and our body’s take over. You need to identify if you are having problems responding and tell her that you need to think about it and you will get back to her. If you do this make sure you DO get back to her and soon. Otherwise you need to learn how to identify your own body language, some basic tips and traps to avoid.
Jealousy
Jealousy can be a killer in relationships and needs to be avoided. The ease in which women may feel jealously is a result of their past experiences and your current communication. It is very beneficial to have an open discussion early on in a relationship about how she feels about you spending time with other female friends or even glancing across the road at another woman. Perhaps you can put a spin on it that you like to look because it makes you feel great about what you have. It is essential that your insecure girlfriend or partner understands no matter how much you look around, it is her that you have eyes for in the ultimate scheme of things as she needs feel secure in her relationship with you.
The key to an Insecure Girlfriend is – Communications
The old romantic tricks work to overcome some insecurities, but don’t overdo them, reassurance and loving touches add to the picture, but most of all making sure your girlfriend does not succumb to insecurity through an open and honest communication.
You need to be open with your girlfriend or partner. Have a discussion night, where you ask each either other 5 questions about each other. Perhaps give them these 5 questions the week before so they have time to think about how you both really feel about them. Write down your responses, so you cannot change them after you have heard how the other person responds to them.
No relationship is perfect and if you have an insecure girlfriend you will need to help her feel special and grow your bond.
I highly recommend you get this 1000 Questions for Couples it is a great way to truly get to know your partner and overcome insecurities.
